Why?!?!?!

Why?!?!?!

     Ichigo was staying at home, taking a break from Hollow-hunting and just chillaxing on his computer, googling what fangirls had drawn about his epicness. Unbeknownst to him, several very good artists had taken up a certain form of art involving homosexuality... Looking through the pictures and stories, Ichigo came upon a seemingly innocent doujinshi. He proceeded to read it, seeing his Hollow side and assuming it was about him defeating Hichigo...
      However, things did not go as planned. Ichigo's scream was so loud it scared all the birds in a 50-mile radius into hiding, and shattered the eardrums of several unsuspecting canines and felines. "WHAT THE F-censored- IS THIS S-censored-?!?!?!?" he yelled at the top of of his lungs. Rukia and Renji, who were over to visit, winced at the sheer volume his voice went up to.
     "Ichigo, what's wrong?" Rukia asked.
     Renji hmphed. "There's no need to be so nice, Rukia. He nearly broke our eardrums just then!"
     Rukia just ignored him. "What in Yamamoto's Hidden Candy Stash were you yelling about?"
     Ichigo clicked the back button furiously until he'd exited the doujinshi (which by now you realize was one of yaoi). "There's nothing wrong!" he said panickedly. "I just...saw a really weird picture of a dragon eating me!!!" Renji looked up in interest.
     "A dragon eating you? That I have GOT to see," he exclaimed, getting up from the bed and walking over to stand behind Ichigo. "Come on, go back forward."
     "NO!" Ichigo shrieked, making Renji and Rukia wince again. "Erm, that is, it's too disturbing..."
     Rukia shook her head. "I've faced near-death a million times, and you tell me I'm too weak to look at a gory picture? Come on, Ichigo." She knelt down and tried to pry the mouse out of Ichigo's hands. However, he wouldn't let go, and they fought over it until Renji finally got fed up.
     "For the sake of Byakuya's Lipstick! Just use the arrow keys!" As he said it, his hands reached for the keyboard. Rukia restrained Ichigo, and the screen flipped to the first page of the doujinshi. Finally defeated, Ichigo went limp and hid his face (caught again!). After several long minutes of silence as they read through the entire doujinshi, Rukia spoke up.
     "I...I never knew you were so into...homosexuality, Ichigo...And with your own inner self too..."
     "That 'dragon' is eating you...just not as we expected..." continued Renji.
     Rukia wrung her hands awkwardly. "Erm...I-I think we'll leave you to your devices now..." So saying, she and Renji backed away and sat back on Ichigo's bed, as far away from him as possible. Ichigo sighed in defeat.
     As soon as they'd turned away and gone back to their own stuff, a little voice in his head spoke up. "Hey, King. I never knew you were such a pervert." He could practically hear the smirk in the Hollow's voice.
     "Shut up," he replied in his head. "It's not my fault they won't hear my side of the story."
     Hichigo snickered. "You're not so innocent yourself, King. Feel your crotch."
     Ichigo felt where his Hollow self had suggested, and his face immediately grew red in embarrassment. Rukia looked over right then, but quickly turned her head away when she saw what she thought he was doing.
     "Shut up! You're making my body do that! Leave me alone!"
     Hichigo, however, was happy with what he was doing. "Nuh-uh. You want me to leave, you make me leave, and that means coming back in here and fighting me! This time I'll definitely win. So, you up for it, King?" said Hichigo with a smile in his voice that could be heard.
     "In your f-censored-ing dreams!" replied Ichigo. Too late, he realized he'd said it out loud.  This time, both Rukia and Renji looked over at him with worried looks on their faces. He ward his hand at them to tell him he was alright, then went back to his conversation. "I'll never fight with you again!" said Ichigo into his head. But Hichigo had gone.
     Going back to his browsing, Ichigo found it hard to concentrate. All he seemed to see were the Yaoi pictures and stories, with some of the weirdest pairings. Him and Byakuya, him and Renji, him and Grimmjow, him and Ulquiorra, him and Uryu, him and Aizen, him and Gin, him and Ikkaku, for crying out loud. After viewing those pictures over and over again, Ichigo was finally fed up.
     "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!?"
     The frustrated scream he let loose was heard over in Hueco Mundo, where Aizen was currently drawing out battle plans with Tousen and Gin. At the sound of Ichigo's loud voice, Aizen crushed the pencil he was using into a like of dust in his anger.
     "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!?!"
     In Ichigo's home, all three of them were freaked out by the strange echo, which sounded so much like Aizen...